We create our own realities

In our class discussion this week, we are focusing on self-efficacy, motivation, and self-esteem from a social-cognitive and behavioral perspective. One of my classmates, Melissa, wrote this at the end of her post:

"All in all, we humans tend to create our own "suffering" based on the perceptions, reactions, and acceptance levels of situations."

I found that to be a profound statement of truth. No matter the circumstances, most of us can create our own brand of suffering. Obviously, there is suffering in our world and many people are truly victims of others. However, I am learning more and more that once we are aware of our stuff, it is what we do with it. Often, we hold on to the past and thus "create our own suffering". We choose to identify ourselves with our pain, our perceptions, our unrealistic expectations. And we suffer because of our stinking thinking.

If I'm honest, I still have areas where I create my own suffering. For instance, in my workplace I find it easy to take the "poor me" attitude. Yes, things are often unfair and the culture there is skewed toward time in rather than performance. However, God has placed me there for a reason. So, do I complain or do I serve? The choice is mine. The choice to suffer is mine as well. When I focus on the negatives instead of serving, I am choosing to suffer.

I know what it is to suffer, to be a victim, to be stuck in being a victim. I also know the freedom I have found through changing my perspective and choosing not to be stuck in my suffering. I know the freedom that is only found in forgiveness; forgiving others and accepting forgiveness for myself. I know the peace that comes from letting go and giving it to God. Some days, I don't do so well at this. But overall, there is progress. There is peace that I never could have imagined. The struggle through the valley and learning how to trust again; it was worth it. It was so worth it.